Help desk jokes (very funny)

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  • Anonymous
    13/09/2005 at 7:49 am #2212

    Helpdesk: What kind of computer do you have?
    Customer: A white one…

    ******
    Customer: Hi, this is Celine. I can’t get my diskette out.
    Helpdesk: Have you tried pushing the button?
    Customer: Yes, sure, it’s really stuck.
    Helpdesk: That doesn’t sound good; I’ll make a note .”
    Customer: No … wait a minute… I hadn’t inserted it yet.. it’s still on my desk…
    Sorry…

    ******

    Helpdesk: Click on the ‘my computer’ icon on to the left of the screen.
    Customer: Your left or my left?

    ******

    Helpdesk: Good day. How may I help you?
    Male customer: Hello… I can’t print.
    Helpdesk: Would you click on start for me and…
    Customer: Listen pal; don’t start getting technical on me! I’m not Bill Gates!

    ******

    Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can’t print. Every time I try, it says
    ‘Can’t find printer’. I’ve even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor,
    but the computer still says it can’t find it…

    ******

    Customer: I have problems printing in red…
    Helpdesk: Do you have a color printer?
    Customer: Aaaah……………….Thank you.

    ******

    Helpdesk: What’s on your monitor now ma’am?
    Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me in the supermarket.

    ******

    Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.
    Helpdesk: Are you sure it’s plugged into the computer?
    Customer: No. I can’t get behind the computer.
    Helpdesk: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.
    Customer: Okay.
    Helpdesk: Did the keyboard come with you?
    Customer: Yes.
    Helpdesk: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another keyboard?
    Customer: Yes, there’s another one here. Ah…that one does work!

    ******

    Helpdesk: Your password is the small letter a as in apple, a capital letter V as in
    Victor, and the number 7.
    Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters?

    ******

    A customer couldn’t get on the Internet:
    Helpdesk: Are you sure you used the right password?
    Customer: Yes I’m sure. I saw my colleague do it.
    Helpdesk: Can you tell me what the password was?
    Customer: Five stars.

    ******

    Helpdesk: What anti-virus program do you use?
    Customer: Netscape.
    Helpdesk: That’s not an anti-virus program
    Customer: Oh, sorry…Internet Explorer.

    ******

    Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has put a screen saver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears!

    *******

    And then there is my personal favorite!!

    Helpdesk: How may I help you?
    Customer: I’m writing my first e-mail.
    Helpdesk: OK, and, what seems to be the problem?
    Customer: Well, I have the letter ‘a’ in the address, but how do I get the circle around
    it?

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